Monday, October 08, 2007
Courage?
After feeling down for the past few weeks, I felt something/ someone strikes me. The comment from my ex colleague/buddy (Pauline), suddenly became so obvious. She said that I have been complaining all these while. She reminded me of my long forgotten lesson "Sow what you reap". She also used to say I always choose to escape from problems and the problems will only re-surface.
Maybe it's really time I shld stop complaining. :p
I have decided to face my problems.
1. To see the doctor for a review. (which I just did.) He has written a referral letter for my company doctor to send me for (i) a scope to check my stomach, (ii) an ultrascan to check my GB.
2. To face my fear for funerals. (which I just did too.) Attended colleague's grandpa's wake alone as other colleagues were not free. And sincerely hoping he rest in peace and have a peaceful journey after dead.
3. To realise and be truth to my feelings. (I am still trying althot I think I already know the answer.)
I hope it's a right move and good start to all my fears, weaknesses, worries etc.
Problems
Have been quite a while since I last updated my blog huh?
For the past few weeks, I have been a confused girl. If you have been msn-ing me, you wld have seen my msn nick as "confusion strikes, confusion strikes again..."
Have been worried about my health, work, relationship etc.
Health: Have been on a 1-month medication which is coming to an end and I shld be going back for review. Family and frens have been persuading me to go for the scope, which I have procrastinated for years.
Work: Ok.. It's lots of confusion. Still dunno my role, still dunno if what I am doing is correct. Sometimes it seemed like waste of effort, sometimes it seemed like on wrong track...
Relationship: When it comes to relationship, I am 1 person who can't sense, can't think, can't decide. There have been choices all these while but... yes. can't sense, can't think, can't decide.